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Monday, November 15, 2010

How to be Happy :))

Updated on 15th Jan 2016
We all yearn for happiness and strive for it in different ways.Yet it eludes some of us completely and persistently.Why?A very tantalizing question--that! According to  Dalai Lama "Happiness is not something ready made.It comes from your own actions".Does this mean that we are responsible for our misery too ?

This should lead to a good honest session of introspection.Are our actions always aimed at increasing the quantum of happiness? Or are we more concerned with other issues related to wealth,status,power,success,competition,rivalry,and jealousy?But do these pursuits really make us happy?Every new acquisition or achievement enthralls us for a short while and then it is relegated to the background as a normal feature of our lives.It goes without saying that some amount of money and comfort is needed in order to be happy.But if status & riches were the sole essentials for happiness,we would not hear of multi-millionaires & celebrities committing suicide.If you act in tandem with what gives you real peace of mind,and not what the world recognizes as the mark of a success,you will be happy.

Be flexible
We do not always get what we strive for.Flexibility is an important ingredient of happiness.If one door refuses to open, knock at the next one.Incidentally this is equally true of romantic relationships.It is a fallacy to think that only that one person who thwarted your advances or ditched you, was worthy of your affections.The world is full of deserving persons who can be loved and will love you in return.

Nurture your relationships
Accept love and reciprocate it generously and genuinely.Warmth and support of friends, relatives & colleagues are a source of joy and security.Don't take them for granted,express your love and gratitude for their presence in your life.Spend quality time with your loved ones.Share your thoughts and worries with them.They will help you to overcome your problems--or at least offer moral support.Whenever you are down and out, recollect dear relationships and pleasant memories--these will cheer you up.It is truly gratifying to realize that one is loved & needed by other significant persons in one's life.The therapeutic value of such an assurance cannot be overemphasized.

Live in the present
It is no doubt essential to make reasonable provisions for future needs but other than that it is best to live in the present.This is absolutely essential when you are going through a rough patch.Living one day at a time makes the burden more tolerable.
Worrying unduly about future or obsessing about the past ruins the present.If perchance,you have committed some blunders then use them as stepping stones to a more evolved you.Do not ruminate over those mistakes.Avoid guilt trips and self-bashing.

Be proactive
Face problems as soon as they appear.If you bury your head in sand they could assume gigantic proportions by the time you look up.

Associate with happy, positive souls
Keeping the company of cheerful people will rub their cheer on to you.Avoid doleful and pessimistic people or else they will blacken your mood as well.

Ignore those who are out to tear you down in order to elevate themselves & also those who are over-critical & habitual faults-finders--they will not only demoralize you,but also leave you tense and frustrated.

Shun Negativity
Equally important --shun negative emotions like, anger, fear, hatred, jealousy,greed and vengeance.If you think you have been wronged by someone, try to look at things from his perspective & forgive him if you can.A closure gives peace of mind.

Spread cheer
The best way to be happy is to make others happy--smile at them,compliment them,help them,appreciate them and see their happiness coming back to suffuse your mind and soul.

If you have spare resources give to the needy--it is immensely satisfying.

Do not compare yourself with others
Do not compare yourself with others. Appreciate your own worth.Nobody is all tops or an absolute zilch.

Reserve a time slot for the all important 'me time'
Be creative,pursue your hobbies and reserve a time-slot for yourself--your pleasure and your needs.

Maintain a healthy lifestyle
Take good care of your health.Adopt healthy habits.Follow a daily routine of exercise ,Yoga or meditation--whatever suits your fancy.This will stimulate the release of happy hormones.

Be grateful
Last but most important--be thankful for all you have been blessed with.Contentment and thankfulness are the most essential ingredients of happiness because--


You may also like to read--
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2011/09/choose-to-be-happy.html
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2013/02/do-you-sabotage-your-happiness.html
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2011/11/happiness.html
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2012/02/rumination-ruins-happiness.html


15 comments:

  1. certainly happiness depends on inner factors, only when we are expert in avoiding the external factors...
    fulfillment and satisfaction, that's what happiness is all about(i feel)..
    most of us on earth are nether fulfilled nor satisfied what they have(includes me)...
    /DeepaK

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. u r young & u must b having many ambitions-no harm in that...but n obsession to get rich & famous to d exclusion of personal life-----that should b avoided.

      Delete
  2. cannot agree more. yes some amount of money and comfort is needed to be happy but happiness is always within our control and is definitely an internal factor. everyone has their own definition of that 'some amount of money and comfort' and hence a realistic approach towards it is necessary.

    ReplyDelete
  3. your endorsement means a lot thank u friend.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Happiness is something we all wish to achieve and I'm glad I read your article, it gave me a lot of clarity of thought. Over the years I feel attaining happiness is a process, you have to work hard on the way you think to attain it.

    Thanks for writing this :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Saru,connecting to you after a long time.Thanks for this input.
    Love you !!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. 16 Art of life
    1the art of winning friends
    2 the art of dealing with other or pleasing otherd
    3 the art of reforming,refreshing and developing
    4the art of keeping appy and contented
    5the art of organising,leadership and administration
    6the art of learing and teaching
    7the art of enjoying work and leisure
    8the art of speech and letter-writting
    9the art of thinking and creating
    10the art of doing social service and spiritual welfare
    11the art of concealing and revealing
    12the art of leadership
    13 the art of sustenance
    14 the art of bad convert in right
    15 the art of make fun and joy
    16 the art of make good health

    ReplyDelete
  7. 16 Art of life
    1the art of winning friends
    2 the art of dealing with other or pleasing otherd
    3 the art of reforming,refreshing and developing
    4the art of keeping appy and contented
    5the art of organising,leadership and administration
    6the art of learing and teaching
    7the art of enjoying work and leisure
    8the art of speech and letter-writting
    9the art of thinking and creating
    10the art of doing social service and spiritual welfare
    11the art of concealing and revealing
    12the art of leadership
    13 the art of sustenance
    14 the art of bad convert in right
    15 the art of make fun and joy
    16 the art of make good health

    ReplyDelete
  8. 16 Art of life
    1the art of winning friends
    2 the art of dealing with other or pleasing otherd
    3 the art of reforming,refreshing and developing
    4the art of keeping appy and contented
    5the art of organising,leadership and administration
    6the art of learing and teaching
    7the art of enjoying work and leisure
    8the art of speech and letter-writting
    9the art of thinking and creating
    10the art of doing social service and spiritual welfare
    11the art of concealing and revealing
    12the art of leadership
    13 the art of sustenance
    14 the art of bad convert in right
    15 the art of make fun and joy
    16 the art of make good health

    ReplyDelete
  9. Well put, Indu. Gave a lot of clarity on the topic? Just one question -- how does one deal with a loved one being cantankerous or nasty? How does one not ruminate or feel affected?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Well put, Indu. Gave a lot of clarity on the topic? Just one question -- how does one deal with a loved one being cantankerous or nasty? How does one not ruminate or feel affected?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Rachna!I feel as if i am meeting you after a long time.I am offline these days--off blogging at least.

      I took this as the very first case in my post about mantras for instant tranquility.What can one say in such a situation except 'S/he is like that only.'?

      Lots of love Rachna.

      Delete
  11. A very detailed account, don't think you left anything for us to be Happy 😊

    I have realized one has to be happy from within...do what you love, without worrying about anything else!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good Morning Alok.
      You said it!!!!!!!!!!!
      I am following your advice these days.
      Thanks for reading and responding.

      Delete

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