Monday, November 15, 2010

How to be Happy :))

Updated on 15th Jan 2016
We all yearn for happiness and strive for it in different ways.Yet it eludes some of us completely and persistently.Why?A very tantalizing question--that! According to  Dalai Lama "Happiness is not something ready made.It comes from your own actions".Does this mean that we are responsible for our misery too ?

This should lead to a good honest session of introspection.Are our actions always aimed at increasing the quantum of happiness? Or are we more concerned with other issues related to wealth,status,power,success,competition,rivalry,and jealousy?But do these pursuits really make us happy?Every new acquisition or achievement enthralls us for a short while and then it is relegated to the background as a normal feature of our lives.It goes without saying that some amount of money and comfort is needed in order to be happy.But if status & riches were the sole essentials for happiness,we would not hear of multi-millionaires & celebrities committing suicide.If you act in tandem with what gives you real peace of mind,and not what the world recognizes as the mark of a success,you will be happy.

Be flexible
We do not always get what we strive for.Flexibility is an important ingredient of happiness.If one door refuses to open, knock at the next one.Incidentally this is equally true of romantic relationships.It is a fallacy to think that only that one person who thwarted your advances or ditched you, was worthy of your affections.The world is full of deserving persons who can be loved and will love you in return.

Nurture your relationships
Accept love and reciprocate it generously and genuinely.Warmth and support of friends, relatives & colleagues are a source of joy and security.Don't take them for granted,express your love and gratitude for their presence in your life.Spend quality time with your loved ones.Share your thoughts and worries with them.They will help you to overcome your problems--or at least offer moral support.Whenever you are down and out, recollect dear relationships and pleasant memories--these will cheer you up.It is truly gratifying to realize that one is loved & needed by other significant persons in one's life.The therapeutic value of such an assurance cannot be overemphasized.

Live in the present
It is no doubt essential to make reasonable provisions for future needs but other than that it is best to live in the present.This is absolutely essential when you are going through a rough patch.Living one day at a time makes the burden more tolerable.
Worrying unduly about future or obsessing about the past ruins the present.If perchance,you have committed some blunders then use them as stepping stones to a more evolved you.Do not ruminate over those mistakes.Avoid guilt trips and self-bashing.

Be proactive
Face problems as soon as they appear.If you bury your head in sand they could assume gigantic proportions by the time you look up.

Associate with happy, positive souls
Keeping the company of cheerful people will rub their cheer on to you.Avoid doleful and pessimistic people or else they will blacken your mood as well.

Ignore those who are out to tear you down in order to elevate themselves & also those who are over-critical & habitual faults-finders--they will not only demoralize you,but also leave you tense and frustrated.

Shun Negativity
Equally important --shun negative emotions like, anger, fear, hatred, jealousy,greed and vengeance.If you think you have been wronged by someone, try to look at things from his perspective & forgive him if you can.A closure gives peace of mind.

Spread cheer
The best way to be happy is to make others happy--smile at them,compliment them,help them,appreciate them and see their happiness coming back to suffuse your mind and soul.

If you have spare resources give to the needy--it is immensely satisfying.

Do not compare yourself with others
Do not compare yourself with others. Appreciate your own worth.Nobody is all tops or an absolute zilch.

Reserve a time slot for the all important 'me time'
Be creative,pursue your hobbies and reserve a time-slot for yourself--your pleasure and your needs.

Maintain a healthy lifestyle
Take good care of your health.Adopt healthy habits.Follow a daily routine of exercise ,Yoga or meditation--whatever suits your fancy.This will stimulate the release of happy hormones.

Be grateful
Last but most important--be thankful for all you have been blessed with.Contentment and thankfulness are the most essential ingredients of happiness because--

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