Sunday, October 31, 2010

How to Imbibe #Positive Thinking

Updated on 14th Jan 2016

Two men look out from behind the bars,
One sees mud and one sees stars.

This is what positive thinking is all about,looking for a silver lining in dark clouds. Actually, positive thinking is more than mere thinking.It is a philosophy of life,a mindset, a habit- -either innate,or developed over the years by diligent practice.It entails facing life's upheavals in an optimistic & constructive manner--thereby making the best of even a bad situation.It is like a true friend; which,once adopted,will stand by you & help you  sail through difficult times. While some people are born optimists others are not so lucky. But this does not mean they are destined to remain pessimistic all their life. They too can become positive thinkers with regular practice.
There is a wonderful concept to guide you further towards acquiring positivity - the concept of  MEMORY BANK . This bank has two kinds of deposits which you can draw from,positive & negative. The interesting thing is that the more you draw from an account the more it grows . And if you don't draw from an account it will diminish. So the thing to do is to draw from the positive deposits  & let the negative ones wither away.
 Suppose an exam is approaching &you have lots to catch up with.If you are  pessimistic you will think that you cannot possibly pass this exam & begin to worry about the consequences that will follow.Your negative deposit will come up with past instances of failures.You will lose sleep, confidence & valuable time;thereby failing and making your prophecy come true. This failure will go to swell your negative deposits so that when the next crisis crops up you will recollect your failures and be disheartened even before you have tried to overcome it.
 On the other hand, had  you recollected your achievements and believed in your abilities, you would have gained confidence , been energized into trying your utmost,passed the exam & further increased your positive balance; which would have  come to your aid again & again.
Here are some tips to get on the positive bandwagon:-
Shun Negative Emotions
Negative emotions like worry, fear,guilt, sorrow, remorse, bitterness, prejudice, greed ,resentment,vengeance swell your negative deposits. The more you draw from them, the more your negativity will increase.This post will help you to get rid of negative thinking.
Keep Away From Negative Influences
If you are already struggling with pessimistic feelings, melancholic persons will further accentuate your negativity-refrain from spending time with them or asking their advice.Shun tragic movies,sad songs & heavy,morose literature.Similarly,if sordid,depressive news of murder, gruesome accidents or other crimes perturb you then shun them on TV & newspapers.
Forgive Yourself
If you committed a mistake inadvertently or knowingly,just leave it there in the past.It should only serve to educate you;and not flog you.It happens with everyone----we learn as we go along.
Do not castigate yourself for everything that goes wrong.
Sometimes events occur at their own velocity.You are not able to prevent a mishap from unfurling despite best intentions & efforts.Flogging yourself for such incidents will only sadden you.You will suffer guilt pangs for what was not your doing at all.
Resuscitate your self-image.
Positive thinking asks for a sound foundation.It becomes  difficult to be optimistic if one has low self-esteem.If we think we are no good then we cannot expect any good from life. Those having low self-esteem tend to focus only on their shortcomings & blot out their achievements.This kills confidence & generates pessimism.Therefore it is important to refurbish your self-image in order to inculcate positive thinking.Nurture your self-confidence.Without it,positive thinking will not be of much help.
Recall your strengths and achievements.Whenever you find yourself losing hope,recollect the accolades   earned, exams passed and targets achieved.Think of the relationships which sustain you.This will renew your hopes & perk up your spirits.Follow this routine at night to get a sound sleep & wake up in good cheer  next morning.When you start the day on a positive note you will have confidence in your abilities, spread good vibes & attract positive people--which is essential to finding success & happiness.
 On the other hand, if you morose,negative people will be drawn to you. They will sap your energy & diminish your confidence--discouraging you with their criticism . 
Not only people, even situations & opportunities that come your way, largely follow your thought patterns. Just a small example--suppose you are faced with two career options,one demanding & the other laid back.If you are besieged by feelings of incompetence & hopelessness you will automatically choose the easier one and hence pursue a second-grade career all your life. 
On the other hand, if you decide that you have the ability & you can do justice to an upscale career, learning the ropes on the way;then you can give it a try & maybe lead a much more fruitful life.
 In this way, you attract what you think & shape your own destiny. As your attitude changes, your ways of tackling problems also change & this, in turn, changes your luck.

Positive thinking subdues worry and enriches our mental health by many degrees.Tensions recede and we feel hopeful of overcoming our troubles.An optimistic fellow is always happier than a pessimistic one.
It enables us to think up a solution to our problem in a rational manner rather than panicking and losing heart.
Positive thinking does a lot more than merely instilling hope and pointing to solutions--it also energizes us to get into the fighting mode in order to overcome our difficulties. We are able to defeat our misfortune & smile again.
A positive attitude attracts friends and cements relationships.
It also boosts our physical health and immunity, while negative thinking leads to anxiety, poor health, poor stamina& poor performance,all of which combine to create a substandard life.
A positive person exercises better control over his life-situations and the quality of his life improves greatly.Certain downturns in life cannot be avoided but keeping an optimistic outlook, looking for the silver lining and concentrating upon it,result in success and happiness.  

The image has been taken from google.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Beat the Blues

Updated on 8-9-18

Tension is inseparable from our lives today.A fast-paced life keeps everyone on edge.Super ambitions and tough competition give scarce time to relax.No one likes to live with tensions but there is no dearth of precipitating factors.Slowly, in addition to destroying our peace of mind,stress damages our physical health too.However,we can contain the damage by modifying our attitude and response toward stressors which impact us.

1) The very first mantra for avoiding tension is to nail down it's root cause and find the solution in a RATIONAL manner.Whenever a crisis looms up it is natural to worry how it will affect our lives.This gives rise to all sorts of fears which increase our despondence and cloud our thinking;thereby suppressing our problem solving skills.Therefore whenever faced with a problem, use your thinking power and shun the emotions.

2) An important requirement for a tension-free life is ACCEPTANCE. Whenever you come across a person or a situation which you don't like but can't change; take it in your stride.Find ways of working around it. Do not obsess about it or fight it endlessly & uselessly.You cannot change what has happened,you will only tire yourself out.

3) Another important attribute which helps to avoid tension is FLEXIBILITY.Life will not always proceed along a road map laid by you.Some wishes will be fulfilled while some others will be thwarted.You may be denied a goal you had set your heart upon or a beautiful arrangement may come crashing down.This happens to many--you are not the sole sufferer.Change along with changing conditions.Do not pine for what was,it has gone for ever..Flexibility implies setting a new goal if the old one is inaccessible.If you don't get what you like ,then it is best to like what you get. 

4) It is not the events per se, but our reactions to them which generate tension.A healthy attitude towards life,reasonable expectations and faith that no matter what happens,you will be able to extract some good out of it;keeps tensions at a low ebb.Positive thinking introduces a touch of balance to a tumultuous mind.It instills hope & assuages tension.Even unpalatable events can turn out to be beneficial in the long run.

5) Look at the TOTAL PICTURE of your life. Do not concentrate on the dark & dreary aspects only.Do you have a sound body,sharp brain,supportive family, friends,a roof over your head,the basic amenities of life,a good education or professional qualification & a job to sustain you?You may not have all of this,but even a healthy body or a supportive family is not bad to start with.Think about the brighter side & do not sweat over paltry irritations.Look at those who are worse off than you.

6)FIX REASONABLE TARGETS which are in tandem with your intellectual,physical and emotional quotient.A major cause of tension is striving for what is physically or mentally impossible.Each person is endowed with unique gifts--running after the herd compels you to undertake what you are not designed for;and invites frustration. 

7) CONTENTMENT goes a long way to curbing tension.If for some reason ,you are not able to reach the pinnacle of your ambition, appreciate & enjoy what you have.

8)COMPETITION is productive only up to a certain point--after that it becomes taxing and frustrating.

9)Say NO to what you cannot handle.Don't heap too much on your plate.


I am sure if you try to inculcate the above habits you will feel more relaxed and tension-free.When agitated because of a tough situation,tell yourself 'This too shall pass',and you will feel lighter.