Thursday, June 2, 2011

THERE IS HOPE ONLY IF THERE IS LIFE

Do you want to commit suicide ? Feel there is no charm left in life ? Are you facing a problem which is giving you sleepless nights ? Do you feel that you have lost control over your life & you can do nothing to improve the situation ? The  future seems bleak &you don't have the energy to carry on any longer ?

If the answer to these questions is yes then you have taken the first positive step by clicking this site . See ? This means you have NOT lost control over your life . You CAN think rationally & take necessary actions .All is not lost yet .It feels good doesn't it ? Now keep the good work going & read further .

At this moment you are hurting very badly .Your reservoir of pain-tolerance is full to the brim & you cannot live with it any longer .You are right ,it IS full or you would not be contemplating suicide .But what if the pain decreased . Wouldn't life be worth living again ? You probably feel this is not possible .Bear with me &read on .

The first thing to do is to lessen this pain .It can be done only if you divulge your feelings to someone so that the volcano of suppressed emotions finds an outlet .Do you know someone who will give you full attention ,respect your privacy &give you sound advice ? A relative ,a friend a teacher ,a colleague ,or a neighbour ? Perhaps you did try but didn't get proper response  .It pinches badly but consider this -may be such a situation was new for him & he did not know how to react .Your loved ones would shudder to think of you committing suicide & they might have thought that if they took it lightly or brushed it off, you would forget about it.

If acquaintances have not helped then it is time to look for professional aid which you are wisely doing .Go a step further & meet a counselor a psychiatrist or a psychologist .Today's hectic lifestyle is hard on everybody.Tensions are mounting &support systems are depleting .One who has been hit badly needs to talk to someone.Don't hesitate to reach out for help .Itdoes not indicate that you are a weakling or a failure .It happens--our plans go awry ,we face failure ,loved ones depart , relationships break , people betray & we are left hurt & disillusioned .The pain becomes too much to bear &we want to end it all .

But you didn't give in &looked for a solution .This is a very good sign.The spark is there in you yet .So what should be the next step? In case there are any doubts left, do yourself a faviour ,postpone your plan for two days .
(1) On the first day visit a counselor.

(2)On the second day sit down &think with your head rather than your heart .How best can you improve your situation ?Which steps should you take for this ?Take the first step on this very day .

(3)Get busy playing the role that is yours at the moment .Follow a normal routine & take up morning walk , yoga ,pranayam ,meditation or exercise without fail.Exercise increases the flow of feel-good chemicals like serotonin,dopamine & endorphins --the last are natural pain killers & mood elevators.Exercise also uses up the excessive stress hormones like adrenaline & cortisol.

(4)Spend time with family &friends .It will assure you that there are people who care for you.Even if you are somewhat disillusioned with them ,give them a second chance.Perhaps you misjudged them or they may be regretting their callousness towards you & this initiative will give your family ties  a new lease of life.

(5)Take up a pastime that gives you pleasure .Think what gave you pleasure before all this happened & lose yourself in it once again.Unless you try really hard you will not get out of this rut easily.

(6)Continue your liaison with your counselor /doctor .

(7)Find out how others cope in similar situations.

(8)Let the closest member of your family know that you were on the brink of suicide so that they can be on guard for you.

(9)You can mail me at  indu.sahyog@gmail.com .
Remember life is much larger than any misfortune,failure or emotional set-back.Time does heal.The pain will lessen and the sun will shine again in your life.If one door has closed look for other options.Don't be dogmatic about wanting only that which has been denied to you.Be flexible.Look forward,not backwards.

Do this and you will be fine !!!!!

(10)There are a few more posts on this blog which can help you, like :--
 http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2012/02/rumination-ruins-happiness.html
 http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2010/10/beat-blues.html
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2012/07/suicide-dreaded-word.html
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2013/04/suicidal-thoughts.html
http://jeeteraho.blogspot.in/2013/09/preventing-suicides.html


8 comments :

  1. Thanks Indu.. It is really usefull.. keep going.. waiting for other tips

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  2. I am glad u liked it,i feel terrible when i hear of a suicide.

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  3. Indu, I wish this post had been read by the sister of a very dear friend who took her own life in Jaunuary this year. My friend is unable to forgive herself because it happened when she was away and out of station- infact her sister spoke to her in the morning before attempting this in the afternoon. I was there later in the hospital when the final news was delivered. I do not want this to happen to ANYONE! But th eissue is that we do not have enough coping systems in our country. We do not give importance to mental stress to the extent that we should!

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  4. Meera you felt the fumes of this tragedy at such close quarters-it is no doubt living hell for the near ones when this happens....there is a lot of stigma attached to seeking help for mental issues...if only it were not thus, so many lives could be saved.

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