Saturday, December 1, 2018

Self-Acceptance-The Key To Happiness

"The moment you accept yourself just the way you are is surely the moment you find peace".Many of us do not accept ourselves the way we are,which means we are perennially dissatisfied.

Causes of non-acceptance
You are fine as you are
Discontent most often arises from comparisons and comparisons can never be fair since each person is born with a unique package.

Many people feel inadequate or inferior because of the community,family or social stature to which they belong. 

Then,there is Body Dysmorphic Disorder which can be very excruciating.A minor flaw or an imagined one,can adversely affect the whole range of that person's activities or behavior.Today's emphasis on the externals adds fuel to the fire.

Sometimes those who have been exposed to abuse:whether physical,sexual or emotional, also feel uncomfortable in their skin.Abuse makes them feel like the under-dog and they blame themselves for having attracted abuse.

If it was someone else whose personality we disliked we could easily have shunned that person and carried on blithely, but it is the imperfections which we see in our own selves which pain us hugely and prevent us from enjoying life to the fullest.

The image which we build up of ourselves is not merely an image for us but it is what others see us as,because it governs how we work and relate to others.It holds us from realizing our full potential and it is best to change it.

   In order to accept yourself better:
  • Realize:you are a unique mixture of many qualities and skills which no one else is.
  • Recount your plus points-daily if need be.
  • Remember,nobody is perfect.Those who appear to be so,do a good job of projecting themselves.
  • You too,put your best foot forward.Don't be your own adversary.When you disregard your plus points and focus only on your flaws, this is what you are doing. 
  • Which is that quality which gives you an edge over others?Exploit it to the fullest.
  • And which deviation hurts you most?If it is God-given then you cannot change it.Just accept it and be at peace.
  • If that anomaly can be corrected then make it your mission to correct it.
  • Just think of the people who like you-do they not like you as you are?Including the real or imagined peculiarities?
  • Nobody is the living personification of all that is good or completely bereft of what makes a person worthy,except maybe,the criminal psychopaths.
  • Try to fathom from where and when this tendency to think of yourself as being below par,different,not so worthy,arose.Whatever triggered it can be better used as a learning lesson,a guide for future.Forgive yourself for any gaffe or miscalculation committed by you.It is Self-compassion that you need and not self-hate.
Love yourself,accept yourself,and be proud of your good qualities.When you begin to love yourself-not to the point of narcissism mind you-more people will pay attention to you and you will no longer feel inadequate or inferior.Acceptance of self is imperative for growth and happiness.    

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Image courtesy google.


  1. Very useful tips Indu.

  2. This post yet again is relatable to what I go through as a person on a regular if not daily basis. Your series have been of great help to me on a personal level, Indu and thanks for the small tips in the blog posts.

    1. Vishal I am glad I could help you in some way.I know you as an erudite person and I am sure you will overcome your difficulties very soon.Perseverance and persistence is all that is needed.

  3. Hi Indu, very useful tips.
    Wish you and everyone near and dear to you a Merry Christmas! :-)

    1. Hi Pradeep.Thank you.
      A Merry Christmas to you and your dear ones too.


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