Tuesday, November 7, 2017

A Negative Outlook,and How to Change It.

Contrary circumstances will evoke negativity in anyone,but it generally subsides when things get back to normal.However, a negative outlook becomes a prominent character trait in some people.They see flaws and disadvantages in everything.There are plenty of complaints and criticisms but no constructive suggestions.A proclivity to denounce and not appreciate is also seen in negative people.For them,the glass is always half empty and not half full.It becomes an instinctive reaction-coming spontaneously from their guts.

A negative mindset distorts reality and presents it as much more alarming and depressing than it really is.The result is a flush of disturbing emotions like fear,despair,anger,hatred,jealousy,anxiety and pessimism.

This kind of outlook has a deleterious effect on all aspects of life.However dissatisfied you might be with your current state of affairs-whether it be in the sphere of your job,home,marriage or the city you reside in-you hesitate to introduce changes or make a new beginning because you can only see snags in the available options.

Even when you do make a new beginning,since you do not hope that anything worthwhile will come out of it,you make half hearted efforts and thus prove yourself right.This accentuates your negativity even more.As the famous personal development guru Zig Ziglar said "positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will".


Changing from negativity to positivity can bring about a refreshing change in your life.If you  want to achieve this:

Stop complaining!

Wherever possible,focus on the humorous aspect of things which irk you.

Appreciate any service rendered to you.

Check the habit of criticizing others.

Think up their good qualities and comment on those instead.

Resist the tendency to contradict what others say.

Don't pick flaws in others' performance.

Acknowledge the good work done by them.

Recount your own talents,abilities,achievements and strengths-however dormant they might be in your mind at that point of time-whenever you take up a new task.

Spruce up your self esteem.

Build up your self confidence.

Finally,take a moment before you form your opinions,trash the thoughts which are not factually correct,bite your tongue if you are about to say,or even think something negative;and the world will soon see you in a positive avatar.You will realize that your life, the people around you and the world on the whole is not as bad as you had taken it to be. You will find greater joy and success in life.


Tuesday, October 24, 2017

When Anxiety Becomes Too Overpowering.

Anxiety has become a sort of epidemic today,everyone experiences it from time to time.For some of us it becomes more than occasional bouts of worry and apprehension.But even for them,sometimes it becomes too strong to be left to the usual coping mechanisms.It needs quick action for immediate redressal.Consider if some of the following could meet your needs:
  1. Scream,shout your pain out at a secluded place.This is incredibly therapeutic.
  2. Punch your pillows.
  3. Tear a newspaper to bits.Vent your anger on it.
  4. Pummel an old rag with your feet. 
  5. Jog,run,do aerobics.This will consume the excess adrenaline released because of overpowering anxiety.
  6. Do some stretching exercises to relieve your muscles which had become taut due to anxiety.
  7. Mow your lawn or hoe the soil in your garden.
  8. Wash your car.
  9. Now that the anxiety has decreased a bit,sit in the midst of nature.Admire the greenery around you.Watch the birds flitting here and there.Listen to their calls.Feel the air as it soothes your skin.Relax,look at the brighter aspects of your life.
The first four tips might look a bit quirky to you-especially those who are straight-laced by nature-but extreme situations require drastic remedies.Anxiety mustn't be allowed to occupy your mind space for long.

The aforementioned tips are only meant for instant relief.You will have to take other measures for a full cure.You can choose from the many initiatives which I have discussed in detail in this post.

When one is in the throes of anxiety one does not feel like moving around or becoming active but this is what increases the anxiety.A lot has been written about the efficacy of exercise for curing anxiety or depression,but many have little faith in it.In order to convince them here is an excerpt from:

https://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/treatment/exercising

"What many people don't yet realize is that daily exercise alone may be powerful enough to drastically reduce your anxiety.Studies have shown time and time again that there is an incredibly strong relationship between anxiety and exercise-one that could tip the scales towards living an anxiety free life."

This same site goes on to enunciate the benefits to be had from exercising regularly.So,begin a healthy routine of exercise and open the door to an anxiety free life.


Tuesday, October 10, 2017

The Hurdle Race

I remember watching the hurdle race when I was in school.The hurdlers knew well their limitations and knowing also the consequences of a bad fall,they did not attempt the impossible.I not being the sporty kind,watched from the sidelines.

That was school.Adult life is different.We have to participate in many races.We cannot sit comfortably in shade and watch others sweat it out.And we also do not like the idea of others winning prizes while we are left bereft.Whether because of a dire need or spurred by the hope of winning prizes at the end of the race; we are slowly inveigled into joining many races and jumping over steep hurdles.

The hurdles in adult life are invisible but no less daunting.Joy overflows when we clear a hurdle.If we fall and scrape our knees we just smear an ointment and carry on.The problem begins when we scrape our spirits;when we allow a failure to define us,to fill our waking hours and steal our sleep.That is the time to sit up and cogitate.Was it necessary to cross that hurdle?Was the hurdle too high?Were we in the wrong race altogether?How important was it for us to jump over that hurdle and win that race?

If failing a race makes us despondent and miserable,clearing every successive hurdle and winning much awaited laurels too can sometimes have a negative fallout.

Some of us get so involved in running races and proving our worth that we do not pause to consider whether all those races are absolutely essential for us.This fact does need consideration because while we are running a hard race we have to put many other issues on the back burner and some of them might be equally important for our health and happiness.

If we go overboard with crossing hurdles and gathering prizes,nemesis may not be far behind.It might come in the form of physical exhaustion for one,physical or mental disease for another,and a broken home or relationships for the third one.

Take a look at what Dr Joseph Maroon,a professor of neurosurgery at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center says in his book"Square One:A Simple Guide to a Balanced Life" :

"I've had rather impressive success [and] cataclysmic failure personally," Maroon says. "I was intent on becoming the very best that I could in terms of my profession, neurosurgery. I worked extremely diligently. It became an all-encompassing pursuit for me in my life … with success, societal approval, writing papers, going to national meetings … Soon after becoming chief of neurosurgery at a major university hospital, I [cracked]. My father died, my wife and children left me, I had to quit my profession as a neurosurgeon due to the overwhelming stress … all within one week … The next week, I [was] helping my mother run a rather dilapidated truck stop left to her by my father in Wheeling, West Virginia, living on a farm. One day I was doing brain surgery and [the next] literally filling up 18-wheelers and flipping hamburgers in a rundown truck stop. It was a great fall. It was kind of like an Icarian metaphor of flying too near the sun. I got scorched and I plummeted into the sea — a sea of depression."

Personal advancement is a driving force of life but it should not be confused with a greed for name,fame and wealth.When our stamina is at it's peak it is possible to wear out our bodies to any extent.Our body and mind do give subtle signals that they are being abused but we ignore those signals.In this way we defy the very objective for which we labored so hard-a happy wholesome life.

The quote by Dr Maroon taken from
https://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2017/06/18/how-to-recover-from-burnout.aspx